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Welcome to the hysterical, madcap world of 'health n safety', where boiling a kettle requires a competence regime and conkers grow in bubble wrap.

This page features a collection of stories which will have you pulling your hair out (assuming you still have some).

Previous stories
Wheelie bin ban 'ridiculous'
28th August 2014 (Westmorland Gazette)
A health and safety edict which could mean bin men being told to stop moving wheelie bins has been condemned by a local councillor.
A step too far
18th August 2014 (Daily Mail)
A disabled pensioner has been left with two months' worth of rubbish because bin men refuse to climb the three steps outside his house to collect it.
Approval for nightmare flats
12th August 2014 (Hertforshire Mercury)
Plans to turns empty first-floor offices on a business park into flats have been labelled a "health and safety nightmare" despite Council approval.
Bus ban for teenage dwarf
27th July 2014 (Daily Mirror)
A teenager who suffers from dwarfism was banned from taking his bike onto two buses after the drivers refused to accept he was disabled.
Pensioners face £350 bill for new letterboxes
18th July 2014 (Daily Express)
Residents at a sheltered housing scheme in Gloucestershire have been told to replace their letterboxes because they no longer complied with fire safety rules.
Bent beyond belief
19th June 2014 (Daily Mail)
Council bosses have ordered a Yorkshire town to take down home-knitted Tour de France bunting after claiming the weight of the wool was causing streetlights to bend.
Show dogs catch ban
16th June 2014 (Cumbria Live)
Health and safety advice has forced dog show organisers to drop frisbee-catching and biscuit-catching categories from a forthcoming competition.
Sports Day ban over crush fear
4th June 2014 (Daily Mail)
Teachers have banned parents from attending a school sports day in case it leads to a 'Hillsborough-style crush' on the playing field.
Sign of the times
17th May 2014 (The Sentinel)
Locals are falling victim to ‘mad' health and safety rules after being banned from removing out-of-date planning notices tied to lamp-posts.
Not such a bright spark
17th April 2014 (Western Morning News
A shocked mum was told by a Cornish shop she couldn't buy birthday candles for her ten-year-old daughter because of health and safety fears.
Baffled by litter fine
14th April 2014 (Croydon Advertiser)
A bemused council tenant was fined £75 after her bin was deemed a health and safety risk.
Sticks in the throat
14th April 2014 (Worcester News)
A school has been accused of taking health and safety rules to the extreme after an eight-year-old boy was banned from carrying his cough sweets.
Take the high road
8th April 2014 (London Evening Standard)
Residents have been left craning their necks to read a council notice which is installed so high - for health and safety's sake - that no one can read it.
Wrong kind of metal
31st March 2014 (Daily Mail)
A great grandmother has been banned from visiting a day centre in her own wheelchair after council health and safety bosses said it was made of the 'wrong' kind of metal.
Fork off
24th March 2014 (Metro)
Liverpool City Council is considering banning pavement cafes from allowing customers to eat outside without a plate, knife and fork due to health and safety rules.
Not very bright
23rd March 2014 (Daily Mail)
Health and safety is being blamed for the Metropolitan Police paying a maintenance firm £100 just to change a light bulb.
That's rubbish
22nd March 2014 (Kent Online)
Refuse collectors in Canterbury are being ordered not to carry bin bags a few yards to their trucks because doing so would be “acceptable for the safety of the binmen”.
Great Western in hot water
21st February 2014 (Wales Online)
Commuting can be stressful at the best of times but one worker claims she wasn’t even able to enjoy a morning cup of tea on her train due to “health and safety”.
Rampant stupidity
14th February 2014 (Daily Mail)
A council has paid £40,000 to fit 10-level, 60m eyesore at the home of a young bulbar palsy sufferer who needed a simple ramp.
Not caught on camera
12th February 2014 (The Echo)
While reckless racers cause havoc on Canvey's streets, CCTV cameras bought to catch them sat in storage due to concerns over their effects on lamp posts.
Felled by safety sign
27th January 2014 (Daily Mail)
An eminent Cambridge academic has criticised the 'mindless cattle excrement' of Britain's health and safety culture after injuring himself on a fallen 'safety' sign.
Fending for themselves
23rd January 2014 (Morpeth Herald)
Teachers and parents are unable to help children across a road outside their school due to not having appropriate training or insurance.
Running ban at Wallsend school
17th January 2014 (Daily Mail)
A primary school has told pupils not to run on its tarmac playground in case they fall over.
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